Polly Dogood

An Apology to Mr. Hoover

Wherein the Author begs the Pardon of a much-maligned President, for having compared him to the present one.

To the late Mr. Herbert Hoover, of West Branch, Iowa, with a Copy to the Readers of this Publick Blog,

Sir, I owe you an Apology.

For some Months now I have heard my Neighbors compare our present President to you, and I confess I have done it myself, at Supper, with some Relish. You are the Name we reach for when we mean a President who stood at the Wheel while the Ship ran aground. I had always thought the Comparison fair. Having lately read up on you, I find it is unfair. Unfair, that is, to you.

Let me give the Particulars, so that you may see I have done my Homework.

The Tariff. In 1930 you signed the Smoot-Hawley Tariff, though one thousand and twenty-eight Economists signed a Petition begging you not to. Our Trading Partners answered in kind, the Commerce of the World shrank like a wet Stocking, and your Tariff has served ever since as the Example every Schoolchild is taught to avoid. That was a grave Error. But you, Sir, at least went to Congress for it. Our present President laid his Tariffs by Proclamation, and in February the Supreme Court informed him that the Power to tax belongs to Congress, which I believe you could have told him for nothing.

The Deportations. Under your Administration, our Government set about driving out People of Mexican Descent, on the Theory that they were taking the Jobs. Hundreds of thousands were pushed across the Border, by some Counts over a Million, and a great many of them were American Citizens, Children born in Los Angeles sent to a Country they had never seen. California formally apologized in 2005. It took them seventy-five Years. I do not expect our own Apology any sooner.

The Veterans. Here I must put down my Pen's lighter Nib. In the Summer of 1932, Veterans of the Great War camped in Washington to ask for the Bonus they had been promised. The Police shot two of them dead. You then sent the Army, and General MacArthur, by most Accounts going further than you ordered, drove them out with Tear Gas and burned their Camp. You called them Agitators and Communists afterward. It was the worst Day of your Presidency, and the Country never forgave you for it. I raise it not to excuse you but because, in your Day, Soldiers turned against Citizens in the Capital was a Scandal that ended a Presidency. In ours, the Guard is sent into American Cities over the Objections of their Governors, and it is called Tuesday.

The Climate. You came to Office at the Tail of an ugly Decade. In 1925, tens of thousands of the Ku Klux Klan marched down Pennsylvania Avenue, and they marched with their Faces bare, so little did they think they had to hide. The Year before, Congress had passed Quotas to keep out the Italians, the Jews, and nearly every Soul from Asia, on the Pseudo-science of Blood. In 1928 your Opponent, Mr. Smith, was savaged for his Catholic Faith, and you did not ride that Wave, though you did not refuse to be carried by it.

But here is the Difference, and it is a large one. You did not speak their Language. Our present President has said that Immigrants are "poisoning the blood of our country." He has called a whole People, our own Neighbors from Somalia, "garbage," more than once in a single Breath, and his Cabinet applauded. In 1925 the Prejudice marched unmasked down Pennsylvania Avenue. A Century later it has taken up Residence at the other End of it.

The Building. And now the Comparison I find most unfair to you of all. You were an Engineer, Sir, trained in the very first Class at Stanford, and you never once found it necessary to tell the Nation you were a very stable Genius. Our present President has told us so himself, in Writing, and in other Writing has denounced a Thing as "unpresidented." I believe it was the one Word he ever got exactly right.

You built Things that work. As Secretary of Commerce you brought seven quarrelsome States to the Table and got them to share the Colorado River. As President you saw the great Dam begun that still bears your Name, and still holds back the River, and still lights the Desert, near a Century on. Before all that, you organized the Relief that fed Millions in Belgium and across a starving Europe. When you failed, you failed while trying to build.

Our present President has torn down the East Wing of the White House to make room for a Ballroom, at a Cost I am told is some Three Hundred Million Dollars, and now wishes to raise himself a triumphal Arch at the very Gates of Arlington Cemetery. You poured Concrete to hold back a River. He pours Gilt to hold up a Reflection. The Dam still works. I have no Hope at all for the Ballroom.

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And lastly, Sir, the thing for which I most admire you.

In 1932 the People gave their Verdict. You lost forty-two of the forty-eight States. It must have been a bitter Thing, after a Life of so much Accomplishment, to be so thoroughly dismissed. And you accepted it. You conceded, you handed over the Keys, and you went home, and you spent your remaining Years feeding the Hungry of another War when President Truman asked you to. Of all the Things a President may do, that is the one the Republick cannot live without: to lose, and to leave.

So I withdraw the Comparison, Sir, with my Apologies, and I will say it as plainly as my Grandmother Silence would have: the present President is worse than you were, and it does you an Injustice to pretend otherwise. You were a Man of real Gifts who failed in a terrible Hour. History has named a Dam for you, and also, I am sorry to say, the Shanty-towns. It has not yet decided what to name the present Age. The People will have their first Say in the Matter on Tuesday the 3rd of November, and I intend to be among them.

Readers, I would only add this. A President cannot do any of these Things alone: not the Tariffs, not the Deportations, not the Soldiers in the Streets. He needs a Congress that will look the other way. Mr. Hoover lost the House in 1930, two Years before he lost the Presidency. We have the same Chance in a Fortnight and a little more. Take it.

P.S. I am reliably informed that the Vacuum Cleaner bearing your Name is no Relation. I note only that it, too, has done more to clean up a Mess than the present Administration.